Silv’s first Tuesday update, woo. And peeling off skin and rolling around in salt should only be done by trained stuntmen. That’s why they have the stupidly expensive health insurance after all.

Got some new fanart this week, it’s a very cool pic of Lothar by Demon Aero. I think it’s incredibly cool, thanks a lot man.

So I got a brand new shiny PC recently, and to celebrate I’d though I’d get Half-Life 2 since everyone was going on about It. That’s was a big mistake as Half-Life 2 is one of the dullest games I have ever played. I spent two hours walking around a sewer/canal system, jumping on pipes while SOMETIMES getting attacked by enemies as thick as the Berlin Wall. And sometimes Manhacks, which were fun and annoying considering the only really useful weapon against them was the crowbar. Admittedly the Gravity Gun was fun, for about 5 minutes, but I don’t see how the hell all the reviews I read make it seem like the greatest thing in a game ever, as after a while it just becomes another gun. I got through Ravenholm when I realised I was pretty much bored for the entire game, the only bit I think I really liked was when I did jumps in the airboat, and ONLY the jumps. So I uninstalled it and used the hard drive space to back up everything on EN.

What I especially don’t get is the falderal (there’s a word I never thought I would use) about the physics engine. Fair enough it’s impressive but for fucks sake, does Valve have to make me notice it? OK Valve, I get it, these wooden boards I have to break every 20ft to progress break apart just like they would in real life, CAN I PLEASE GET ON WITH THE FUCKING GAME NOW? And these barrels roll around like they do in real life right? I DON’T FUCKING CARE ABOUT BARRELS! JUST LET ME GET ON WITH THE FUCKING GAME! Like I said the Gravity Gun is fun and uses these physics well, but even then I don’t care. “OMG! YOU CAN PICK UP A TOILET AND THROW IT AT THE ENEMIES!” Ok…and? In the end the Gravity Gun and the physics, while technically impressive, are not really selling points to me. I don’t fucking care, I care about if they make the game any fun, and they don’t.

The combat in the game was OK but you don’t do a lot of that, instead you spend a lot of time walking around waiting for an attack, and maybe solving the odd “puzzle”. And by puzzle, I mean looking for a handle, turning it, and continuing on.

The story isn’t that impressive or original either. Its basically rips off George Orwell’s “1984” and “Big Brother” and throws in a little of H.G. Wells “War of the Worlds” as well. And then throw in some characters that I like (Alyx, Barney and that black guy with the fake leg who I forget the name of) bust mostly with ones I just want to shoot. People have told me the ending is crap in the way Halo 2’s was. The difference was that even though in Halo 2 the ending was trying to be far too epics for its own good, I really like Halo’s overall story. Half-Life 2’s I couldn’t give two shits about. The way it was presented is interesting though, as you see everything through “your” eyes, no cutscenes at all. It’s something that should be seen in a view more games, though one or two have touched on it, but not to this degree. A drawback of this presentation is that it makes Gordon Freeman utterly un-likeable, because he has ZERO personality. I suppose this is supposed to make you feel like that you ARE Gordon Freeman, but for me it just made me want to meet Gordon and smack him in the face with his own crowbar.

Ultimately Half-Life 2 is dull and lacked a crucial element for games. FUN. I bet I’ll get a few emails telling me I should have kept playing to get to the “good” parts. But I am not spending 4 hours bored out of my skull to play some part of the game that everyone says is good, but I’ll probably don’t like. I’m also gonna assume I will get emails from people saying there is something wrong with me for not liking the game. FUCK YOU ALRIGHT?! FUCK YOU RIGHT UP YOUR GOD DAMN ARSEHOLES! You like Half-Life 2? FINE. I don’t, FUCKING DEAL WITH IT! And just to point out, I’m not the only one who isn’t a fan. So Half-Life 2 is dull, and anyone who starts sending me retarded emails about it can just go and get Syphilis off a prostitute. GOT THAT?!

Enjoy the comic, later.