Lothar is busy doing… something. Probably burning his Hl2 disc or something, and as such can’t update. That said, microwaving a disc would be quite amusing. For lack of much else to add, if you have any amusing ways in which to destroy a Half-Life 2 disc, tell us. If I can be bothered to remember, I’ll post the more amusing ones on the site next Friday.

Also, if some of you are in fact stalking me (Which I doubt, but you never know) you’d know I got in on the City of Heroes EU Beta and have dedicated my evenings to getting my arse beaten by a horde of level twelve Outcasts, Trolls, or the unholy hordes of the Clockwork King. I created a Blaster (That is, a superhero that uses ranged attacks) with a Technology origin (His powers derive from the body armour he built), with the Assault Rifle/Devices power sets (Yes, I laughed at the idea of a gun being a superpower too. I guess that makes the US a nation of “capes”, then). I kitted him out in full armour, sprayed him green and dark red and dubbed him “Shockwave”, his full title being “Shockwave, the Amazing Man of Science”. Admittedly, he has a crappy origin (Poisoned by Circle of Thorns, yadda-yadda, seeks vengence, yadda-yadda, is a Brit) but I took time to try something original. And I daresay a few have.

But thus far, I have seen two Wolverine ripoffs (One called “BloodyLogan”), a Nightcrawler, a “Saiyan” (or however you spell the damnfool thing), an Agent Smith, heard rumours of numerous Hulk ripoffs, in addition to typical “l337″ names. Their costumes are pretty pants, being either direct rip-offs or just generated randomly. Now, this depresses me. It just goes to show people are really lazy, and just wish to play the grind rather than… roleplay. Which is what I try.

And yet, you see cool characters. Super Santa, was one I especially liked. Watching Santa smack the snot out of Council operatives was satisfying in the extreme. Also, a pair of low-level heroes I aided, they were pretty cool. ZOEL was one of them I think (Sorry if I got the name wrong), and unlike most people whom I help when they’re on the verge of being killed by something that is both big and ugly, was gracious and thanked me for my help. I had only really wanted to weaken the bugger so they could kill it… After all, we all were n00bs once, and giving one a little help makes the whole game a better, more relaxed and satisfying place to game. Bitching about kill theft (Or indeed stealing kills for your own gain) just drags the experience down, much like “5p1d3rm4n” and random costumes.

So, yes. People like BloodyLogan and Saiyan should have their bloody accounts wiped and told to be more original, especially as the devs are in the middle of a lawsuit with Marvel. Better yet, they should be forced to fight Cthulhu. Not in game. Actually taken to Ry’Leh and forced to face Great Cthulhu in mortal(ish) combat.

So in closing? People like that are dicks. People who steal kills for the sake of it are dicks. People who bitch about you stealing their kills when you’re saving them from highly probably death are dicks. But the rush of a level up, the feel of a new power, the thrill of butchering a group of thugs to save some old ladies purse… that is what makes the game worth playing. Flying through the air with the greatest of ease.

Join me, if you can. Look for Shockwave on the English beta Server. I’m lurking in the northern segment of Kings Row right now if you fancy smacking up a few Outcasts in Steel Canyon. I’m only level eleven, so please don’t expect me to go to The Hive or the Rikti crash site. Kay? Good.

~ Eastwood, his victory is only logical, citizen!