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Oop, that took a little longer than I anticipated, sorry for lateness.

December 3rd, 2004 | by Virus

This:

is a train timetable. See all those numbers on it? A sensible person might assume those numbers have some correlation to the times the trains arrive. Oddly, this is not the case. Those numbers mean nothing. They are entirely fictitous, with no bearing on reality whatsoever.

So, what have I been up to when I haven’t been stood freezing my arse off on train platforms for upwards of 30 minutes? Check it out. Is it awesome in here, or is it just me? *Smug Mode activated* This is what I was working on last week when Silv covered. No, he has no pupils as of yet, will get to that. Also got the long annoying process of rigging ahead of me now.

So I’m pleased with this model. But apart from finishing that, today (time of writing, i.e. Thursday) has not been a fine day for science. One of those days where the world goes “That’s right, I’m gonna pick on YOU today, repeatedly and maliciously, just to see if I can piss you off.” And misery likes company, so sit down and shut up while I rant some more.

Smoking tobacco ranks among one of the stupidest ideas mankind has ever had. I mean seriously, whose idea was that? At what point did “Lets inhale the foul smelling poisonous fumes giving off by burning leaves” seem like a good idea?

You know when a house burns down and people die? Do you know what most of those people die of? Rarely do people burn to death, usually they’re killed by “smoke inhalation”. Yeah. That should give you a big fucking clue right there.

Okay okay, I won’t go on a tirade about the health effects. I don’t exactly live a healthy lifestyle myself, so it would be somewhat hypocritical of me. I consume more than my fair share of junk food, soft drinks, caffiene etc. Pleasure first, long term consequences later. Carpe diem, I know how it is.

What really annoys me though, is how godsdamn rude it is to smoke around other people. Cigarette smoke smells awful. I mean really fucking bad. Not all smoke smells that bad; woodsmoke has quite a pleasant smell. If cigarettes smelled as nice as that, I wouldn’t have a problem. But tobacco burns with a horrible, acrid smoke that irritates my throat and my eyes. I can’t imagine how unpleasant it would be to inhale that crap directly. Ugh.

Consider this hypothetical situation:
You’re standing there, minding your own business. Perhaps waiting for a train that is ridiculously, unforgivably late and will not actually deliver you to your destination until one whole hour later than it was scheduled to. A man walks up and stands next to you. Undisguised, and unashamedly, he lets off a massive stinking fart. He continues to emit these foul smelling farts for the next five or ten minutes. Not once does he apologise, or show the slightest bit of shame or concern for inflicting such nasal discomfort on you.

Isn’t that farting guy the rudest son of a bitch in the whole fucking world?

Smokers are like that. Except farts smell better and don’t give you cancer.

Virus

#071 – Stabbing, Sawing, Shooting: The Three S’ Of Splash Pages

December 3rd, 2004 | by Lothar

This strip has nothing to do with me. I basically told Virus to do 1 big panel and go crazy with the battle scene. What you see here is a work of his creative genius.
Bit of return pimpage this week. Dave of SNAFU comics is apprantly a big fan of EN. Thanks for the linkage Dave. And Secondly I just felt like putting a link of the front page to our newest affiliate Squirrelworks. Which is very cool and I say everyone should at least take a look. Thanks.

I rented GoldenEye: Rogue Agent, this week. I get free rentals from blockbuster every week because I work for a subsidiary. I’d like to say that because of this I haven’t wasted my rent. But the fact of the matter is GoldenEye: Rogue Agent is the WORST FPS I have played in the last few years.
I could go on and on about what is wrong with the game but I’m gonna focus on one thing this week. In the game you can take enemies hostage. It’s rather pointless as your hostage’s comrades just keep shooting at you and take no notice of their mate Charlie shouting, “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON’T SHOOT!” Ok that doesn’t happen but it’d be funny. Anyway, the thing is the enemies take EACH OTHER hostage as well. Yes they take their own allies, which you were about to shoot, hostage.

What exactly is the point of this EA? I am not going to spare my enemies because they decided to take one of their mates hostage. All it means is that I just have to keep shooting a bit longer to kill them both. Seriously, what’s the point? I don’t see any Elite’s in Halo 2 taking Grunts hostage:

Elite: Stay back or I’ll shoot the Grunt!

Master Chief: OK, shoot the Grunt. Saves on my ammo.

Elite: I’ll do it, don’t think I won’t!

Master Chief: Go on then.

Elite: I’m going to!

Grunt: I just wet myself.

Elite: Shut up you.

*Master Chief attaches plasma grenade to the Grunt*

Elite: Oh pissflaps.

*BOOM*

*Master Chief continues on his merry genocidal rampage*

Laters.

Lothar

I am the typo king!

November 26th, 2004 | by Silversword

*mumble mumble mumble*

Silversword

#070 – A Loyalty That Transcends All Fear

November 26th, 2004 | by Lothar

Do not adjust your monitors. There’s nothing wrong with the comic. Silversword has drawn it this week because Virus got swamped with University work. And I don’t want ANY annoying fuckers complaining about “What happened to the great artwork?” like last time Silv covered. He’s a fucking brilliant artist with his own great style. Which incidentally is NOT Virus’s style, SO NO FUCKING BITCHING, ALRIGHT!?

Good now enjoy the damn comic. Even though this script again isn’t one of my best. But whatever, I’m tired, slightly cranky (which is like how Mount St Helens only slightly erupts). It’s 11 PM, I’m fucking tired I’ve spent FOUR fucking hours turning my room upside down and inside out looking for this University book I needed which turned up to be in my bin. Now before I go to bed I have to fucking put everything back. So basically I couldn’t possibly give a shit about the script quality right now.

I mean Christ! I didn’t even get to play Halo 2 today!

Lothar

#069 – 13 Dwarves, 1 Hobbit, and a Really Old Wizard

November 19th, 2004 | by Lothar

Anybody who doesn’t know where East’s lines in the last panel come from is not up on their pop culture well enough.

New fan art this week:
1) Haloverdose by Mr. O.M.A.
2) Virus Pillaged by Junichan.
3) Lothar Pillaged by Junichan.
4) Lothar Fan Girl Association by Junichan.

As for how come I wasn’t here last week. Basically I played Halo 2 all day on Thursday and wasn’t up to doing a news post. When I say all-day I mean that literally. From 9AM till midnight I played non-stop. Which should tell you my thoughts on the game pretty much but I’ll go into more depth.

Basically, Halo 2 is better than Halo 1 in pretty much every respect, but has some of the same problems. Some repetitive level design (but not as much as Halo 1), a few boring enemies plus a really annoying cliffhanger ending. However the BEST XBOX LIVE MULTIPLAYER EVER plus a really deep storyline, great graphics, great music, fun characters, destructible vehicles, dual wielding, and new enemies. It’s not perfect, but it’s an excellent game and I recommend it wholeheartedly.

I’d do a proper review, but if you go read this review at Gamespot it pretty much sums up my views. Plus I talk about Halo 2 more in depth in Psy’s latest 1019.

That’s all from me this week, laters.

Lothar

#068 – This Way Up

November 12th, 2004 | by Virus

I guess Lothar’s busy. Apparently some game came out. He might have mentioned it once or twice. So I’m just gonna ramble on for a bit. Watch as I branch and tangent subjects at random. Lothar might be along some time to comment on Halo, if he hasn’t drowned in his own fanboy drool.

So I bought a Red Dwarf DVD yesterday. Series IV, which seems to be one of the series I’ve seen repeated the least number of times on TV. I’d taken in my laptop to uni, and on the train on the way back, I thought I’d see how mobile my media capabilities were. There was only about 40% left on the batteries, and I knew better than to think that would last the whole journey. But I thought I might at least get partway into an episode. Not so. Didn’t even make it off the DVD menu screen. 40 to dead in about thirty seconds flat. Playing DVDs must be quite the power drain. And laptop batteries must suck. I hardly ever run the thing off the batteries; portable computers are only portable between one mains socket and the next. ‘Laptop’ is something of a misnomer too. You do not sit with a laptop on your lap for any period of time. They have a habit of burning the top layers of skin off your legs. Sons of bitches get hot.

Gods damn, don’t you hate it when you’ve been using one program a lot, then switch to another and keep pressing the wrong shortcuts? The 3D program I’m using, Softimage XSI, I kept trying to scroll around by holding the space bar. I finally got used to the real shortcut, which is ‘s’. So now I’m back in Photoshop for the comic, and I keep pressing s, when I want the space bar. Gah.

I’ve not done anything in 3D really worth showing yet, BTW. We had to model a low polygon car, done that, but it’s ‘eh’. It’s a 1970 Plymouth Barracuda. I didn’t have time to add the flame decals or the 80 foot robot, sadly.

Since learning more about the principles and practices of animation, I’ve started to appreciate cartoons even more than I did previously. And I’ve realised something. Y’know how anime fans always claim that their shows are better animated than western cartoons? What they actually mean is, they’re better drawn. Because what the anime fans seem to forget, is that the word ‘animation’ implies movement. And Japanese shows like to cut big ol’ corners by not actually animating a scene, but by having still images pan sideways to fake perspective, or by having somebody speak without moving except for their mouth (which even then only opens and closes in three or four different frames). Notice how western cartoons have far simpler character designs compared to anime? That’s another one anime fans like to flaunt – ‘look how simplistic and childish the designs are in the west’. But there’s a good reason for simplistic designs. Low budget TV animation is a trade off between detail and movement. The simpler a character, the easier and faster and cheaper it is to animate. Japanese shows like to blow all their budget on pretty drawings, and leave movement as an afterthought. But in western shows, movement is everything.

The show I’m currently hooked on is Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends. And a fine example of western animation it is. Heavily stylised, with very simple, low detail designs, it’s the sort of show anime fans would blow off as being childish. I mean, the central character, Bloo, looks like a Pac-man ghost (a fact which was parodied in the very first episode). But I revel in the animation here, every second of it. Some of the most effective animation happens in dialogue scenes, when there’s very little actual action taking place. The sort of scene that, in anime, a character would hold a single pose while their lips flap open and closed. That’s because the usual procedure in Japan is that they animate first, and record the voices afterward. In Foster’s, as with all western animation, it’s very clear that the voices were recorded and then used as reference during animation. This allows for subtle movements that match the voice work and accentuate it. Bloo in particular has a very pronounced way of speaking. He often puts strong emphasis on certain words, when he’s being sarcastic, or smug, or overexcited (all of which happen all too often), and not only do you hear the emphasis in the voice, but you see it on the character’s lips and eyes, often his limbs, and entire body.

When people comment on the art in the comic, one of the things they always mention is the facial expressions. Well I got a tip for ya: Stop watching anime, start watching cartoons. Virus out.

Virus

#067 – Madness Mantra

November 5th, 2004 | by Lothar

Moving the plot along, funny may have suffered, apologies.

Fan art:
1) Love Child by Ultimate Creature II
2) The Inqusition Wants You by Xiaon
3) Lothar Hex by Scott Shepard
4) Scarface by James Farmer

And we have a new forum, no longer hosted on The Fallout Shelter. Simply because, well, we wanted our own. Everyone is invited to join the new forums which are located here. Enjoy. And thanks to Ian and Tara for hosting our forum for the last year. You guys rock.

Also, I have a special request. According to our Japanese correspondent Junichan, at the Tokyo Game Show someone cosplayed as LOTHAR HEX. Now, her friend did take a pic on her mobile phone, but the has been corrupted in the transfer from phone to computer. Now, if the person who cosplayed as Lothar is reading this. PLEASE SEND ME A PICTURE! MY EGO ISN’T BIG ENOUGH YET! I NEED THIS KIND OF VALIDATION!

So I guess some of our American audience want a British guy’s view on the US Election. All I have to say is that the story of George Bush is inspirational. If a man with the IQ of a Monkfish can get elected president twice, who knows what the rest of us can do.

And finally, don’t expect a news-post from me next week. Halo 2 is out on Thursday in the UK and like I am going to waste time talking to you lot when I could be playing it.

Lothar

Did somebody say they wanted toast?

October 31st, 2004 | by Silversword

A few people have pointed out recently that we aren’t the only site to have a possessed toaster somewhere on it.

I don’t know whether to feel dissapointed by that or not. ;)

Silversword

#066 – Holiday: Snikt Snikt, Bub

October 31st, 2004 | by Virus

Man, it’s been a productive week. Check it out. A regular comic, a large panel Halloween comic, a Lothar/Wolverine wallpaper, and dun-dun-dunn, a cast page picture for Rogue. Those’re slowly filling in. Three down.

Make sure and hit previous to see Friday’s comic, in case you’re checking midweek and missed it.

Virus

One more fanart I just got:

October 29th, 2004 | by Virus

Western Day by Samantha Alvarado.

As noted at the beginning of Lothar’s post (for the benefit of those with short attention spans), I’ll get a Halloween strip done for Sunday. It might not be up until the evening, say 7 or 8 o’clock, GMT. So see ya then.

Oh, and I got a deviantART account. Not that there’s much of anything there yet. But hey.

Virus
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